Do you know how important it is to let your partner explain their actions? Good communication is the basis in any relationship. And also equality. Therefore, in some cases, we do not let the other say what he thinks or feels. This makes it ‘close’ as if it had a shell and it is very difficult to start a conversation.
It is very important to allow the couple to explain their actions … even if we do not like them, even if they do not interest us or even if we consider that it is not essential. Find out more in the following article.
Let the couple explain their actions
Lack of comunication
Without a doubt, one of the biggest frustrations in a couple’s life is not knowing what that person with whom we share our life thinks or feels. The little expressiveness may have started during childhood or be one of the main characteristics of his personality.
If it is someone ‘reserved’ or ‘introverted’ it is likely that when you met him it was already that way. And perhaps at that time you have downplayed it … until one day you realized that it was very difficult to start a conversation.
Allow the other to express
A relationship is formed by two parts; each of them with their virtues and their defects. And although it is said that ‘we must love the other as it is’ the truth is that sometimes some of its characteristics have an impact on the well-being of both.
Letting the couple explain their actions has nothing to do with oneself, but with the other. Of course, because when a person has the ability to express himself, he feels happy with himself and his self-esteem increases.
Put yourself in your place and think about how you would feel if your partner does not allow you to say what you think, feel or do . Of course, distraught and frustrated ! And worst of all, you will be less and less willing to share something with that person.
In your hands is helping your partner to trust you and ‘open’ to tell you what happens to him. Even if it is something small or a huge and decisive thing in your life (or in both).
Keys to let the couple explain their actions
Just as a person can prevent his partner from explaining his actions, he also has the possibility to make him grow and improve in this aspect. There are many human beings who do not like to tell what happens to them, even to their most intimate circle.
And while it is not a matter of forcing the other to do what he does not want: we must explain what are the advantages of being more communicative. For example, strengthen the relationship and increase complicity between the two.
In the event that your partner does not talk too much about himself, the future or his tastes, perhaps it is time for you to help him. Keep in mind the following:
1. Trust your partner
There is a theory in the area of psychology that is called the Pygmalion effect . It means that once a prediction is made, these same words cause it to come true.
It can impact for better or worse on the other person. For example, when a father tells his son that ‘he cannot be a professional soccer player’ it is more than likely to end up happening.
Therefore, use it to indicate to your partner that he is able to say what he feels, to open up to express his thoughts or to be more communicative . In addition, you can apply this concept to other areas of life, so that others can achieve their goals.
2. Look for positive alternatives
Another way to allow the couple to explain their actions is related to their conception of things. That is, if you think everything is negative, it will be harder for you to verbalize it. On the other hand, without considering that there is any possibility of improvement or solution, you may communicate it.
You must rely on your knowledge to see when the other feels distressed, worried or even angry. And once he tells you what to do, show him the positive side. In this way, he will feel more comfortable talking to you and will trust you in future occasions.
3. Listen carefully
On many occasions, it is we who lead to certain behavior in the other . If, for example, in the past we did not pay attention to what our partner said, we probably do not feel like talking.
Listening should be passive while the person ‘exposes’ the subject in question and then become active in order to advise. But attention, because it is not about giving sermons as if it were a child (or your child).
4. Do not press
To let the couple explain their actions if they are not too communicative, it is essential to avoid the pressure. You could do a ‘little ant job’ where little by little let you know the benefits of opening a little more.
If you feel pressured you can act in the opposite way to what we expect. With time and much patience, he will begin to say what happens to him.